Lisa:
The 14 hour plane ride was surprisingly not as miserable as I thought. I fell asleep during the first 2 ish hours of the flight, and got woken up by the flight attendant who clearly could not tell that I was asleep, or could, but just thought it was urgent and necessary to wake me up to give me my meal, which turned out to be the worst piece(s) of crap I have ever eaten.
My experiences with plane food have usually been hit or miss. The hits usually only come on non-American airlines. So this flight, I decided to call in and pre-order one of their special meals, the vegetarian meal, because plane meat is usually pretty sub-par (plane meat...plain meat, haha get it? uhh ok then. anyway.) I've ordered special meals before and have had a couple experiences where they were actually a lot better, a lot fresher than the things everyone else was getting, so I was hoping that would happen this time too. Not so much.
The first meal I received was... really really horrendous to say the least. My hot entree consisted of: a clump of mushy rice squashed between 2 piles of orange mush: one lighter orange which tasted very much like really bad baby food, and another pile of darker orange mush with indiscriminate mushy type vegetables (potatoes? peas?). My cold dishes consisted of: a stale blob of bread, a vegan chocolate chip cookie which may as well just been a clump of shit with chocolate shits, i mean chips, stuck haphazardly in random places, and some weird rice-y thing with black beans. Needless to say, it SUCKED. But I ate it anyway b/c I was hungry. My stomach was not too happy. The normal meals at least got a salad with lox. I didn't even get a salad?! WHAT KIND OF VEGETARIAN MEAL IS THIS? Strike 1.
Next, (yes you will hear all my food grievances as the heinous-ness that was my food warranted this)
we got this mid-flight "light snack". The flight attendant accidentally gave me the normal snack that everyone gets and set it in front of me: a Turkey croissant hot dog (meh), and a cup of Haagen-Daas Ice Cream (HEAVEN! YES!). But of course, as luck (and my own doing) would have it, the next flight attendant was like, "oh wait, she has the vegetarian snack." So she gave me this mushy, soggy veggie burger crap that looked and (unsurprisingly) tasted like soggy cheese (vegan cheese mind you) covered mud mush. Oh, and I also got another bread clump (hurray). But it was okay because I still had my ice cream, but then... SHE TOOK THE ICE CREAM AWAY (NOOOOOOO) and gave it to the other passenger (because clearly my mush shit will be satisfying enough, and I don't need the ice cream). Strike 2.
and Finally, breakfast right before landing?
Normal passengers got: Fresh fruit plate, jam and shortbread cookie, bread, and a choice between cheese omelet and asian noodles.
What do I get? I'm thinking at least I'll get the fresh fruit plate right? WRONG. I got a packaged Dole fruit cup with cubed fruit WTF. Stale, untoasted bagel (And they don't even give me cream cheese?!?!? Do vegetarians not eat cream cheese?) and for my hot entree, a choice between... oh wait, there's no choice. Un-discernible mushy shit which had some hint of cheese in it... but it'd probably be vegetarian cheese of some sorts, and mushy steamed vegetables with no flavoring. OMG SO MUCH MUSHY SHIT. Strike 3. Definitely switching back to normal meals on the way back.
So besides the food failures (which indeed warranted 3 paragraphs of description), the rest of the flight wasn't so bad. Mainly because they had sooo many movie selections and tv show selections. I watched a couple of pretty decent chick flicks, "Leap Year (Day?)" w/ Amy Adams, "Did You Hear About the Morgans?" w/ Sarah Jessica Parker and Hugh Grant, and La Vie en Rose which was EXCELLENT. It's based on the real life story of Edith Piaf- French singer, all in French, all subtitled.
So that was my flight. I actually took a picture of meal number one (felt stupid for a split second when the flash went off, but realized no one knew me, and no one cared, and no one really gave a f*ck if the weird girl by the window was taking a picture of her mushy plane food), but will post it up later when I can figure out how to get past China's firewall and actually access this blog to post pics up. (Blogs like this one are apparently quite dangerous in their potential for Chinese civilians to mobilize to overthrow the government... hence why it is banned). I'm currently writing through the nifty email system that Madison has set up, so hopefully this even gets posted up.
Anyway, am currently residing at my mom's friend's apartment on the 18th floor. Their grandma,Waipo, cooked a faaabulous meal, which despite being super full, I still ate anyway.
Super excited to go to bed. It's almost 7 pm! YES.
No comments:
Post a Comment